Life has long been a struggle for the LGBT community in Myanmar as people of various sexual orientations seek to be accepted in a rather conservative and patriarchal society.

While there has been progress over the last decade, with Pride days and events that have allowed people in the LGBT – lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender - community to “come out” publicly, the situation in post-coup Myanmar presents its problems.

Pyae Phyo, a pseudonym, says he understands the challenges as he struggles to come to terms with his own sexual orientation and how his family, friends and society have responded.

Pyae Phyo told Mizzima that in order for him to talk about his experience, he needs to accept himself, try to persuade his parents to accept and understand his gender preference, and try to fit into one’s environment.

As he notes, Myanmar society poses a problem.

“Before, as our country was not really developed, LGBT were more oppressed. Currently, as my country's system is in a recessive period I am worried that the situation will get worse,” he said.

Pyae Phyo is now an adult but growing up proved difficult. “It was a hard time trying to accept myself.

Normally, as a boy, I should be interested in girls. However, when I entered adulthood, I noticed that I was not interested in girls. Then, the thought of ‘Who am I?’ came into my mind. Additionally, according to Buddhist belief, I am neither a boy nor a girl in this life because I had committed adultery in my previous life. Thus, when I was young, I felt embarrassed that other people knew my sexual inclination and I was ashamed of myself,” he said.

“When I got older, I could escape from these thoughts. Only when I could accept my existence, I felt much better.”

“Literally, I am just me - a human being who has a right to choose for my life and speak out for what I believe. Both the right to do and the authority are in my hand. There is a phrase I often tell myself – ‘Be proud of who you are’.”

Regarding his parents’ attitude on his choice, Pyae Phyo said: “Telling my parents about my sexual inclination took courage. In the beginning, my parents were egocentric. When my father answered ‘No. You are a man and we do not have this kind of son’, I was very discouraged.”

He said this response prompted him to doubt himself.

“For my mother, she just looked at me without saying much but with surprised eyes seemingly to express ‘What nonsense my son is talking about’. However, I am thankful that both my father and mother let me be who I want to be. Honestly, I am lucky to have these parents.”

Others are not so lucky.

“Many of my LGBT friends’ parents tortured them for being LGBT. Because things did not turn out their [the parents’] way, they labelled their child as abnormal since they consider homosexuality as a mental illness and mental deficiency. As they wanted a manly boy, they punched or hit their LGBT son. There are lots of LGBTs who are struggling to live as human beings.”

As Pyae Phyo notes, many people use slang words to describe homosexual people.

“Those who are called gay and lesbian are considered as someone unfit in the society. Thus, they [LGBTs] become someone who needs to struggle and make a lot of effort [in people’s opinion]. So, LGBT people need to fight for equal rights and opportunities. We all need to respect one another. Whether young or old, senior or junior, male or female, we should learn to pay respect to every human being.”

His message is to accept LGBT people as human beings.

Pyae Phyo said that the society must be educated that stereotyping and discrimination against gays is wrong.

“Sexual orientation is not something that can be changed. We used to hear that people said that a boy who used to be girly became manly when he got older. In fact, the real thing may be that that boy has to hide his feelings and fix his behaviour according to society’s attitude when he gets older. However, most of these changes do not reflect one’s sexual orientation. We cannot eliminate our true feelings. Rather than attempting to change one’s sexual orientation, we should create a society that accepts or welcomes one’s real existence to live comfortably.”

Many families appear to have a problem with their son or daughter coming out as gay or transgender.

Pyae Phyo added, “People should understand how our lives become an oppressed and suppressed class in society. There are many who feel guilty and are being abused.”

“One of my acquaintances was abused by his family. I felt really surprised and sorry when he shared his problems. He was mistreated by his family as they did not accept the truth about him being an LGBT. He was forced to get out of his job and locked in the room without getting a chance to keep in touch with friends. They practice a ‘lock-in-the-room’ technique. No matter that it is the parents' best intentions, it is definitely a nightmare for the victim,” he said.

Pyae Phyo said his friend tried to escape from home several times without success. Normally, some people would see it as nothing because it is just locking the room without physical abuse of him. However, it is a mental abuse.

What is clear is that there are many LGBT people who are physically abused. There were many LGBTs who commit suicide. They gave up when they couldn’t bear the oppression and any more.

“There are inappropriate expressions in people’s eyes when looking at lesbians, gays, bisexual, and transgender people,” said Pyae Phyo, noting that people look down on them.

But Pyae Phyo said LGBT people need to be strong with the hope that they will be accepted as human beings, whatever their sexual orientation.